Hearts of Fire (1987) Review

Hearts of Fire  (1987)
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This movie is, quite frankly, absolutely appalling. It is also, however, possibly one of the funniest movies I've ever seen. Like most of the other reviewers, I watched it simply because I'm a Dylan fan, and it's only because of the fact that I enjoyed it as much as I did. Dylan's ludicrous performance is so breathtakingly bad that it achieves a rare kind of...genius? perfection? I'm not sure how to describe it. But no matter how bad Dylan is, he is nevertheless by far the best part of this stupefyingly bad film (apart from Rupert Everett's terrifying mullet, that is). Skinny-dipping with Fiona, taunting an audience in England, punching out 'handsome' Rupert (in what is the best/worst ever punch in cinematic history - I must have rewound it 20 times) and languidly trashing a hotel room, Dylan is all over the shop, seemingly so bored he doesn't know where to look. Then, right at the end, after the blind girl pulls a gun on Rupert (don't ask) and Fiona 'rocks' her hometown (joined onstage, of course, by Dylan, who throws a cigarette at her), Bob performs a fragment of an incredibly obscure little gem, something I've never heard or heard of before and which alone justified sitting through the rest of this turgid movie. All in all, 'Hearts of Fire' is worthwhile if you're a Dylan fan, if only to see your idol brought down so low. And to have a good laugh.

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